Men’s 1st XV v Eastbourne 17/01/2009

Home – London 3 South East

Report by Andy Ward

Won 44-6

After having a week in the doldrums because of the weather, I had to dust off all my promotional stuff and repair to HQ to erect (so to speak!). After spending a fair amount of the forenoon so erecting, it was time for a quencher of the amber. Fellow troopers J. Arthur Angus and J. Arthur Stott arrived and soon the party was in full swing. A general agreement that the Jack Rabbit was slightly better than the Shiraz followed – but not without great debate I can assure you. Lunch was upon us before we knew it and Charlie (the Chaplain) started the proceedings with his usual eloquent grace. There was also a moments silence in honour of both John Jenkin and Ann Burtenshaw. Ann died last week (wife of Ben) and may I just add my own personal condolences and extend my sympathy to Ben and the family. It was good to see that Ben was able to make the game today.

John Jenkin was a founding father of Hove Rugby Club and also the Olympic Torch Bearer in 1948. Sadly, he passed away a couple of years ago, but it was fantastic that his brother Keith could attend to present the trophy in his honour.

The Trophy – I hear you say? Yes, once more I get ahead of myself. John, apart from being a revered founding father of Hove RFC, moved to Eastbourne in later life and whilst he always tried to get to Hove games, found himself unable to do so all the time and so often settled for a second best and watched Eastbourne! When John passed away, it was decided to play a game each year in his honour and it made perfect sense to dedicate any fixture between Hove and Eastbourne as the John Jenkin Trophy game (very similar to the Brighton game in honour of John Shelton). Keith, John’s brother, commissioned a superb trophy – cut glass on a base and shaped like the Olympic Torch that John carried so proudly for his country.

So, to reposition at the Reverend Father’s grace! As per usual, our own Charlie gave as solemn a grace as he could muster, denigrating all opponents of Hove and on this day, in particular Eastbourne, condemning them to certain defeat – and so it proved to be once the game started.

Bas had his usual altercation with the microphone and despite your correspondent’s sage like advice and instruction on what precisely feedback was and how it occurred chose to shout at everybody instead. The Eastbourne President started to tell a joke and for a minute I thought it was going to be the one that Sherwood texted me the other day. Hang on, thought I – he can’t tell that one with women and children present. Thankfully, it wasn’t the same and a sigh of relief visibly (audibly?) swept through the ranks.

OK, dear reader – you have had to suffer several paragraphs of introduction, before I get to the game itself. Sorry, but I don’t get paid to write this, so you have to put up with my idiosyncrasies.

Precisely at 14:15, referee Bradford (who being from Chichester, I assume is a relative of Alan?) indicated to all that the game should commence. With the traditional swing of the arm and the aural accompaniment of the whistle, the Eastbourne 10 kicked the ball and the John Jenkin Trophy match was underway. I should state at this juncture – in case I forget later – that the referee had an excellent game. He was on top of everything and most definitely played his part in the afternoon’s entertainment. Well done Sir!

In his post lunch speech, the Eastbourne President alluded to some problems that his Club had recently faced and mentioned the game earlier in the season at Eastbourne (Hove 54-5 on the 8th November for all you historians out there) but vowed that it would be more of a contest today. And – certainly in the opening moments – so it proved to be.

From the KO, Eastbourne were threatening the Hove line and produced several waves of attack that Hove managed – just – to repel. A transgression was spotted by referee Bradford so Eastbourne were given a penalty and this was converted to give them a 3 point advantage in the second minute of the game.

Now, Hove had several key players missing as this was a rearranged fixture and coincided with the nuptials of one Jason Ellison and Tabatha Loxley – congratulations both – and so reserves had to be called upon (which denuded the twos who were away to Seaford) but everyone played with great spirit and composure and some of those who missed the game might not just waltz up and pull on the shirt next week. At this Club, there is no-one indispensible. You have to work, want and be proud to wear the shirt. This is Hove.

Two minutes later, Blackbeard the Pirate (aka James Finlason – who had earlier chastised me for giving a try of his to Jamie Waller at OR – corrected now) broke through and touched the ball down giving Hove a five point award. Young Sam (fresh from his labours with Lucy – ooops mustn’t mention that!) slotted the ball over sweetly to gain the augund of 2 to make the current tally at Hove 7 to Eastbourne 3.

It was at this point that J. Arthur Stott and myself were trying to make the scoreboard work – Statto, I need a letter from your Mum excusing you from games! – and we managed to wipe the time out without actually getting the score on the board! Much head scratching… Anyway, J. Arthur figured it out and soon the Las Vegas neon was shouting to the world that Hove were beating the opposition.

Five minutes later, Barry Charles received the ball out wide and slipped a defender then zoomed into Usain Bolt mode and raced to the line scorching the earth beneath his boots and went over to give a further five points to the Hove locker. A second promotion from the twos, came good in a further five minutes when Jack Charles (Charles seems to be a popular middle name!) snaffled the ball and went over in the corner to take the score to 17-3 with only 15 minutes on the clock. Well, the official clock as the scoreboard said 11 but that was only because J. Arthur Stott had pressed the button that I told him NOT to press. Now you know why he’s a J. Arthur!).

After 24 minutes (or 20 if you were an afficionado of the scoreboard and J Arthur’s thumb) Eileen (Ryan for those not part of the cognoscenti – when he works behind the bar he leans a lot…) popped up and touched the ball down to take the score to 20-3 where it remained until half time.

So, half time came upon us and I had to dash in to make the award for the quiz and Bas announced the winners and gave a humble (LOL!) speech – but sadly with the tannoys on. In pops Marty for a shout up saying that it was putting the chaps off their game. Didn’t seem that way to me – but, I guess that because Eastbourne had just scored their second penalty of the game he may have thought so.

20 points to 6 read the scoreboard as the new Statto – J. Arthur Stott – was prodding things like never before. This caused much confusion to the Norfolk brain as J. Arthur had to hold the scoreboard remote in one hand, his phone in the other (just so he could text the planet!) and had no free hand for his beer! So, a sober Stotty for once – unlike the sponsor.

Charles (its that name again) Brock came on for Jack Charles and after 14 minutes of the second half romped over for a great try. I was busy (having a drink) but was told to mention that Watty (no Charles here) ran a fine line to orchestrate the opportunity for young Charles.

Two minutes later, Rory Charles popped up and smashed the ineffective opposition out of the way and ordered a pint of lager – sorry – scored a try to take the tally to 30-6 and causing referee Bradford to start a second page in his notebook.

A mere seven minutes later saw Old Father Time (Matt Wilson!) banish the years and pop over for a try as though he’d just been asked for a date by Kylie. Sam Charles converted this effort – on behalf of Lucy – and all was looking good in the Hove world. At this juncture, Mr. and Mrs. Henderson decided to make a change and fresh from his golfing sojourn, young Matt Charles came on the pitch as Gerwyn Charles left for a break.

But the show was definitely not over. No fat lady was singing just yet (although I thought about it…). Young Eileen (Ryan – come on keep up!) went over in the 25th minute to take the score to 42-6 and Sam Charles scored the conversion to finish the scoring for the day.

An excellent game by all. Commiserations to Eastbourne – but they weren’t bad – just outclassed on the day. Hove had stormed them and Keith Jenkin happily presented the John Jenkin Trophy to Captain Dave (Charles) Wattam and had there been a roof over the pitch it would have lifted off.

Next week sees us at Lordswood and we would hope for a victory – but will have to work for it. Lordswood overcame Lewes away by 12-11 yesterday. Other results this week saw home wins for Aylesford, Deal, Old Elts and an away win for OR at Warlingham. This leaves the table pretty much unchanged with Hove keeping their fifth place one point behind Warlingham, three points behind Aylesford and OR and five points behind Old Elts.

Given that we still have to play Old Elts and Aylesford at home and Warlingham away, there is every reason to believe we can improve on this. And we will.

Now, finally, I must turn to events in the Clubhouse later! The match day sponsor was having a moment’s contemplation – after a busy day – and noticed that some heathen had scribbled all over his face. Many thanks to my colleague – J. Arthur Angus – for preventing any further incursions and a warning to all. I will find out who did it and remember – the pen is mightier than the sword! LOL

A good day, a good game and a great result. Mustn’t forget to mention Harvey Charles (the camera) and congratulate all on a fabulous result.