Men’s 1st XV v Purley John Fisher 29/11/2008

Away – London 3 South East

Report by Andy Ward

Won 16-8

Apologies for tardiness and unfortunately this will have to be fairly brief as I’m short of time!

Anyway, Tim B and I met up at HQ and scoffed a burger to satisfy the inner man before heading of to Old Coulsdon to see if the Sat Nav could find PJF. Its actually a Nokia Navigator phone and I used it for the first time to get to the Telegraph Inn prior to the LC game last week. And it was spot on. Today, going to PJF which is in a place called Parson Pightle – honest – which wasn’t on any map that I could find and BINGO – it got us spot on again. Well done Mr. Nokia.

Arrived into the Clubhouse to see a scurvy lot tucking into Christmas Fayre. Messrs Basley, Finlason (R), Harrison and Windsor no less. Clearly have to see about this!

Upon trooping out to see the match, we had to negotiate yomping through San Sebastian Water – or the local equivalent as mud came up to mid thigh height. Not a promising start and sure enough – the pitch was like a paddy field as well. Mark Spitz (or that new chap who’s beaten his record – can’t recall his name) would have had a field day – but would Hove 1st XV? Only time would tell.

PJF kicked off and Hove accepted the ball and started to work out attacks. There was some good movement but it soon became evident that the mud was going to be a telling factor as it was dragging everyone back.

Ryan made a break as he spotted a gap in the centre channel and sprinted up the pitch heading for the corner flag. PJF tried to cut him off and the full back got to him but not before the ball was slipped out to James Finlason to score in the corner. 5-0. Tom was kicking today as Sam was out injured and he didn’t look too pleased at the task given him right on the far touch line. A good effort, but the score evaded Hove and I know I rattle on each week chaps – but you have to give the kickers a chance. If they could all always get the ones from the touch line they’d be playing for Harlequins and not Hove!

So, 5-0 to the chaps and several decent moves were stymied by the cloying surface. After 15 minutes – in a rare attack – PJF had a couple of penalties and elected to go for the scrums. After a lot of getting nowhere, they took a drop goal and this gave them the three points. Well, talk about buses – you never see a drop goal all season and then two come along in consecutive weeks.

Hove were getting a little irritated at the number of times that PJF were offside and the referee was doing nothing about it. Several attacks came to nought as this tactic proved to be rewarding for PJF. AFter 19 minutes had gone, and good work from the forwards, Rory went over the line but the referee adjudged that the ball was held up. No-one in maroon and blue shared his opinion but it is his opinion that counts.

Hove were to be rewarded for the previous travesty a minute later when the referee gave them a penalty (a rare one in this half) and Tom shot the ball cleanly over to make it 8-3 to Hove.

After more offsides then you could shake a stick at, Liam Hale was mysteriously awarded a yellow card and left the field just 7 minutes before the half time break. And in a chronologically reassuring fashion as those seven minutes ticked away the referee agreeing with all things temporal blew his whistle and the half ended at 8-3 to Hove.

Adam got the second half underway and Liam was back on the field before anyone else could trouble the scorer and in the 55th minute Hove were awarded a further penalty (this half, the referee seemed to be blowing more for Hove – maybe it was their turn after the first half?) and Tom kicked this over for a further three points to take the Hove total to 11. A further quarter of an hour passed and the coach MacTaggart decided on a couple of changes and in the space of 2 or 3 minutes Matt had come on for Paddy and Jack for Glenn. This must have stirred things for three minutes later, Adam found a line and made good yards jinking as only he can before letting Ryan have the ball and he burst through and scored towards the corner. The kick proved beyond Tom and so Hove were 11-3 to the good.

All around were thinking nervously of last week. surely we could hold on this time. As it happened, yes we could but not before a scare. Right at the end of the half (oh and BTW Charlie had come on for Rory at this time), Hove were penalised (someone tell me why) and then marched back a further ten – presumably for some enquiry to the referee. A scrum was called and in the ensuing ruck a PJF player handled the ball forward. The referee blew – presumably to give him a ticking off – but, No. He gave a red card to Harvey Strudwick. This was changed immediately to a yellow one and Harvey was asked to take ten (so that was his game over) and PJF elected for the scrum again. 8 against 7 and the ball was pushed over taking the score to 16-8 in Hove’s favour.The conversion was a joke as the wind blew the ball over several times and surely the minute was up. The ref was resolute that the kick would be taken and so someone reluctantly trolled up the park to pop a finger on it – when all everyone wanted was a hot shower. Well, after all that fannying around it was obvious the ball was going nowhere near and so it proved to be. At that second the ref blew his whistle – probably to everyone’s relief and Hove came out winners at 16-8.This was just one of those games that probably no-one would have volunteered to play in if they’d had a choice. I swear that at the end you couldn’t see the length of the pitch as it was so dark. It never stopped raining, it was brass monkey cold and the ground was difficult to run on – evidenced by players from both teams going down with cramp.

Nonetheless, a man of the match needs appointing and for me it was a toss up between two. Ryan Morlen for non stop running, making one try, scoring the other, tackling like the hounds of hell were after him (take note some of you…) and Liam Hale for winning just about every ball that came within a yard of him at the line, scrummaging well, tackling everybody and carrying the ball well. Choice – well, I’ll give it to Ryan as he stayed on the pitch for the full 80 but it was close. Well done the pair of them – and well done to everyone for sticking with it and dragging a result out of a game the like of which we have often lost in the past.

Next week sees Warlingham at home – and they received a spanking at home against OE. So, everything to play for next week. Let’s hope it doesn’t rain and that we can get back to our electrifying best.